As writers we are always finding things to tinker with in our work before sending it off. But, as I have found to my own cost it is not the number of times a piece is read, it is what you do to it that counts.
One of my previous “fails” has been in Point of View (POV). Point if View is an important part of the story. A story is told from a particular POV and one has to be consistent in keeping that POV, unless it is clear by creating a new chapter or section in the work that a new or different POV is now being considered.
You can’t switch hit from one POV to another from line to line. The story loses focus and the reader will become confused and lost. Have a POV and stick to it.
This is why after I have read it through several times and fixed the continuity, time line and other plot based errors I do an edit that solely looks at POV. I ask myself, from whose Point of View is this section about? There can be more than one character in the section and all sorts of things are going on, but who is driving the bus? If is Jim, then tell the story as Jim would see it.
That means you can’t put things like “Jim handed her the bag and Sarah felt it was too heavy.”
If the bag was too heavy, how would Jim “know” that it was too heavy, i.e. what did Sarah do that would tell Jim that the bag was too heavy? Did her shoulder slump? Did she say anything? That is still keeping Jim’s POV.
I would always recommend a separate POV edit. It makes the work consistent and that will keep the reader on board.